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Split w/ Dog Thumbs

by Another Hollow Summer & Dog Thumbs

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1.
How do I alienate myself from everyone It's the internal struggle that can't be won It's the doubt in my mind that makes me fad into the walls But I'm still waiting for a miracle I'm still waiting for my curtain call Every gig I feel sickened inside Not letting my thoughts of actions out of my mind Not letting the words on the tip of my tongue collide With anyone Or Anything But I need a change A new set of wings Hiding in a bubble Staying away from those that I already know But there's nothing subtle About talking to someone once then avoiding them for months I can't break this habit How can friendships flourish if I lack the courage Now it's automatic The way I wallow in my own antisocial tendencies Fear of rejection isn't something I can forget My whole life I've been trapped in this mindset Will I stay like this Will I fail like this Is failure in myself something I can forgive?
2.
All These weak needs Bring Me down to my knees Bring me down to your level Where it's easier for you to watch me bleed And in the light of what you'd done We'd all seen what you'd become And it let me know I didn't need you anymore All I needed was the will not to live my life Wrapped up in these bed sheets And sorrowful thoughts
3.
All I want is to find a place to get away As my mental health crumbles my care for anything fades Into time spent trying to hide from friends and school It all feels like a waste of time So why should I care if I'm eligible For some fucking uni course That'll lead me to another brick wall I just want to say fuck it all and drop out I can be broke and happy I'm sure my teachers will be fine without me I'll just live in some shithole Fuck it I like my minimum wage job It's the only thing that makes sense anymore Should I choose mediocrity to avoid an education I could live alone in my own little world I've made it this far but I guess there's nothing I deserve I just want to drop out I'm not even joking anymore The options are right there so what am I wasting my time for It's time to make up for all the hours that I've lost Doing fuck all Cos that's seriously all I want I'll drift between sad and angry Till I wake up from this bad dream And I'll gladly trade this deadbeat lifestyle For anything that I can find
4.
I wish the world had ended back in 2012 I was only 16 my problems unseen a pill problem not yet formed a broken heart still whole I still liked to draw I still had a soul but now I am lost and I dont want to be found i wish the world had ended back in 2014 i was madly in love and I could hold a job i was high all the time i knew how to lie I would bleed theough my jeans you would kiss my soul clean but now i am lost and I dont want to be found I know now shes gone I know now hes gone And we dont wanna be found Yea we dont wanna be found
5.
I dont know I dont know what I want to do anymore but please god stop asking me I thought i wanted to be your space cadet but i dont want to be anything anymore love following me everywhere I go leave me alone i dont want this anymore should I rewatch restuko or heathers maybe itll be true romance I probably should avoid all of this it just makes me wanna fall in love love following me everywhere I go leave me alone i dont want this anymore so I’ll just watch hobo with a shotgun put a hole into my brain maybe ill just go for a walk after all its raining outside love following me everywhere I go leave me alone I dont want this anymore
6.
For one reason or another you kept the nickname I gave to you and these dreams that haunt me are the only thing thats new and this dog that sleeps on my bed I dont know if he cares instead I’ll think about rainy days and how I met you if youth is wasted on the young then wealth is wasted on the old cuz I know about 6 people that would give it all up to make sure we all could eat we could all sleep inside have a nice dog or cat and i guess maybe some mice but back to my weird dreams and how i feel about you youll call me on my birthday and ask me “whats new?” remember that time in the bridge by the new parking lot you sang me a song and we had lots of pot we both walked home and we called right away we both said it was really rad and our best day and do I do things just for the story? so I can write about and people wont think im boring and if its true is it really that bad? Im getting out of my shell are you proud yet dad? so what do I do with all of this and whyd I tell all of you? i guess it has to come out before my face turns blue and that stuff about my dog I know he cares a lot I just needed somethin thatd hit your soft spot now I’ll go think about all the stuff I said all the stuff I think and all the stuff I read maybe I’ll just go to bed who knows maybe I’ll get to it tomorrow
7.
and all my failures are brought me by selfishness and greed lack of foresight and money genocide and percocets alcohol and cigarettes are the only crutch I need I think its about time I kill whats inside thats holding me back no really dude im fine just think its about time I kill whats inside thats holding me back no really dude im fine I just think its time I kill whats inside thats holding me back no really dude im fine I just think its time I kill whats inside thats holding me back and I know my dog thinks im cool but that wont pay for my school so I gotta work overtime and I just wont wanna go to bed but i gotta or instead ill be lookin down a barrel of a gun no really dude im fine I just think its time I kill whats inside thats holding me back I dont wanna do this anymore

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released December 27, 2018

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Sugar Crash Records Melbourne, Australia

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